11-30-09

I woke up with the sheets wet, same as the morning before. I figured it was sweat, thought nothing of it and went about my morning. My husband took me to my mother's house and then he went to pay a friend a visit. Alone in my mother's house I started to feel concern because I felt as though I was leaking. My mother convinced me to call my midwife, so I did. My Midwife told me to go see her so she can check if I was indeed leaking amniotic fluid. Called my husband, he turned right back around. On our way to see the midwife I started to feel contractions, not very painful, 20 or so minutes apart (maybe).

We arrive at my midwife, she tells me that she is going to take a swab and if it turns blue I am leaking fluids. Super nervous, I laid there looking over at my husband who didn't know what to make of the situation. When she pulled out the swab it was blue and my heart just sunk and I never seen my husband look so stricken with grief. My dreams of a water birth were shattered. I was afraid. She said I had a hind link, we didn't understand what that meant. I thought that I was going to have to go to a hospital.I was so worried about my baby. She sent me home with a small bottle of Castor oil and told me to drink it with a shake.

What seemed like hours later we arrived home, and shortly after my mother. I ate a slice of pizza, and waited. My Midwife arrived, and then my sister. My contractions were getting closer but not super painful yet. They were about 8 or so minutes apart, she tells me to go for a walk and to come back when they were 5 minutes apart so me and my husband did. I was tired and had to rest.

I changed into my moo moo and tried to relax. I was physically drained before the work even started. I started to feel a little nauseated, I guess that oil and pizza was kicking in. I vomited something serious, and that was painful. I remember the Midwife checking to see how dilated I was and soon after the pain and contractions worsened. I had envisioned my mother and sister being in the room with me the entire time but once things started getting intense the door to the room was closed and the lights were dim, and it got really quiet.

There was so much pain in my lower back and I was so exhausted! I kept switching from laying propped up to being on all fours. I kept feeling like I had to pass a bowl but every time I went to the bath room, nothing. Between contractions I was in and out of sleep. Then I was in and out of the bathroom. My poor husband was just following me around, obeying my commands. The pain was so intense I had to move to the floor. I was leaning over the bed, wondering if it was too late to go to the hospital. I wanted the pain to stop. I wanted to go to sleep. I wanted to quit. I felt like I could not physically do it. My Midwife pretty much stayed out of it. Oh there was another midwife. I don't remember when she arrived and I hadn't meet her before that day. I got back on the bed and felt like I had to push. I pushed. I rested. I contracted. I pushed. I was in every position I could think of. I was hot, I was cold, then hot again. Turn on the fan! Turned off the fan! Now repeat! I was so uncomfortable, finally moo moo came off. The bed was not working for me.

I need my mom, call my mom! My mom comes in. I tell my husband and mom to help me up and they move me to the floor. On my back, leaning over the bed, none of this was working. I start to squat. My mother and husband are physically supporting me with my arms over their shoulders. I push. He crowns. I want to lay back down. My husband and mom carefully lay me back down. My midwife was telling me to push,and I did not want to. I'm not sure what she was doing but I felt like I was being ripped apart. It hurt worse then the contractions, at one point I shoved her hands away from me. I can hear my husband tell her not to cut me, but I really wish she would have, I feel it would have saved me a lot of pain and saved me from the tear I did get. They tell me I have to push because his head is almost out and it wasn't good for him to be stuck like that for too long.  I was so scared. I hear my mom saying "he's right there, feel his head". I touched his head. His full head of hair felt smooshy  and I yelled from shock. When his head was out they can see that his hand was coming out with it. His little fist was up against his face. I tell my mom to call for my sister. I gave one last long push, 12:40am 11-30-09 he was born.


The Midwife put him on my chest. My husband looks over at my sister and starts to cry. He cuts the cord. I deliver the placenta. I attempted to breastfeed. My mid wife asked if I was ok to shower. I thought I was, but I wasn't. I lost a lot of blood and while in the shower I momentarily passed out. When I came thru everyone had just rushed in and I was sitting on the floor of the shower looking up not realizing what had just happened. Luckily I did not hit my head but I did hit my side on the faucet and almost completely took it off the wall. I was helped out of the shower. Got dressed and while I ate my little angel was weighed and measured. 7lbs 6oz 22inches and perfect.

I was in labor for 6 or so hours and pushed for about 45 or so minutes. It was terrifying, but even including all the mishaps I wouldn't change a thing and I can't wait to do it all again!